A Journey Home Again      Sandy Jones

A Joyful Merry Christmas to all,

Today these words tumbled out, it may be too long for you--but I am going to just go with it and trust that they are the right words for now.

My dad's mother was a Christian Scientist, she was a very lovely lady, from what I hear. She was a delicate woman of English ancestry. She was an artist with a soft sweet and gentle temperament. My dad was raised in Southern California (now remember we're talking long ago--he was born in 1913). He quite adored his mother and I am sure it was the influence of his mother's devotion to Christian Science that gave my dad a very special or unusual out look on life. My dad was not a Christian Scientist but he had a certain something about his spirit, he carried a strong and positive aura, a beaming soul of optimistic inner light. And most of all, an obvious fearlessness that I always loved and admired.

One day when I was very young, I'd say perhaps 7 years old, I heard my dad tell my mother (who was Greek and raised Greek Orthodox) that Christian Scientists believe that God is All there is, that God is Love and God is Infinite Divine Mind. He was explaining how this Divine Mind makes us one with this Living Intelligence that Life is--Life and God are the same. He said 'matter' is the Energy of God. As a little girl this made total sense to me. I felt very much in tune with that. My Heart and soul trusted this was 'how it is'. My dad's words spoke to me of Something familiar and Something I already knew was True.

I took that glimmer of Truth and through my growing-up years I worked with it, pondered it, questioned the 'how's' and 'ways' of it and felt the real Truth of It. I would let my imagination wander the idea of an Allness of God's Being, I would envision the celestial vastness of this infinite Universe-- I could see no end, no beginning. I could see there was no inside or outside. I could stand beyond the stars where the view and I were one and I could see God everywhere, being everything that is or ever was. The Mystery and Wonder of it all was Real. I heard the angels sing, I heard the Music of the Spheres. For many years, even occasionally now, when I slept at night I dreamt I had a voice so lovely and I sang glorious praises to God along with this radiant choir of angels that would open their arms and welcome me.

Did that understanding make it so I never lost my way? No, it didn't; it's not supposed to. I had much to learn, a long journey ahead and more to understand; a leaving Home and the eventual return Home had to be made--It's just that way. My little wagon hit some curves, I lost a wheel or two a few times, but when I got tossed and tumbled to the side of the road, well that was when I had to turn around, come back to my Heart and trust this Inner Vision that had been shown to me as a child. That vision has been like the Star of Bethlehem that leads back to the Child--a Place I had once known, had always known and never really left at all.

William Samuel's words were a part of that climb back, that return; I recognized the same childlike simplicity, the uncomplicated honesty, the unpretentious joy and humor, the Mystery, the Heart and the presence of Real Light in his way of teaching; I saw the Truth in William's words. I saw the same Light in his words that I had known as a child. He helped me to remember that Light that lived right here in my Heart.

Life is about rediscovery of the True Self. We all know the Truth, we are born knowing It, being It. But we must leave the child behind and live the arrogant, ignorant 'adult' for a time. It has to happen this way. We are here to make a Re-discovery. The Return is where It really happens. It's all about the second coming of Christ, the born again, the returning to the Child again, coming Home again. That's the most important part. Life leads us to the rediscovery that we are It, have always been It. Joy beyond Joy.

The journey through the world stirs us up and swirls us around and tosses us over board and that's alright, that's as is should be---We are supposed to leave Home--It's a story of coming to the dead-end where there are no more choices except one, which is to turn back to God.

Like the Three Kings, at we lift our eyes toward Bethlehem, we turn around, we head out upon a joyful adventure of returning Home, we are lead back to the Child, the baby in the manger, the one who knows.

In a very beautiful way, its all 'devised' or 'required' so that this time the turn around makes the Truth really ours, personally, deeply ours.

This time, we make the discovery all by our self. This time It belongs to us because we have seen for our self 'what is not' and now we know 'What Is'. We do it all on our own, alone we find It, we know personally, intimately this Eternal Living Light That Is. This time It is really ours, this time we see It is made personally just for us, its ours only, exclusive, special, individual and privately, perfectly fitting us; the Self we find is our Real Self, what fits us better than that.

I know the words do not sound "non-dual" and I know they do not have to--It is very simple; God and Life are One. That is not something the intellect can fathom very well. But the Child can. No matter how far you think you have wandered, the Truth does not leave us, its always here, close by, easy to rest upon. God is the Living Truth and It is Absolutely trustworthy and completely loyal and faithful to us, It never leaves or forsakes us.

That simple idea of the Allness of God has been my North Star and It never failed me. I no longer have any pride or compunction that says I have to explain to others what that word "God" means, or substitute the word "God" with some words more 'quantum, Eastern or educated or sophisticated'.

The Child knows God is All, and the Child Loves God and she Loves the world. The Light is faithful. "Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me." A prayer so very powerful, a prayer that works wonders, comforts us, and leads us Home.

Just those few simple words about the Infinitude of God-- The Divine Mind of God is being All there is to everything-- that is It, that I can return to-- and with time the rest unfolds from there and it all becomes perfectly clear.

How much more All can All be? How Infinite is Infinite?

It's Liberating; there is nothing to change, its all Good. Oh yes, things change, they certainly do; change makes the Changelessness evident.

The rapid changes going on in our world stirs the soul to look again, turn around, head for Home, return to God. When things go 'bad' we ask ourselves "what really matters?" We seek and find that Love is all that matters. We seek and find that the changes helped us to see the Perfect Changelessness that is always here; Undisturbed Immutable All, Powerful, Steady and Real.

The Child is beyond duality and non-duality, subjective and objective---the Child is not beholden to time-space-matter, and not a slave to conditions, circumstances or ideologies. The Truth is not 'in' anything. The Truth does not bow to false authorities. The Truth cannot be imprisoned or diminished, or hidden by any man. The Truth is not bound at all. The Truth does not contend or try to explain Its Self. Knowing the Allness of God is knowing there is only one True Authority and seeing that God is the All and Only, trusting That brings us a Peace that is very deep and a Grace that leads us aright. This Living Grace of God is within every one of us---The Real Freedom and Genuine Liberation is already ours---We just need to Trust this simple Truth.

The words from an old Celtic Christmas song come to mind "The Tree of Life my soul hath seen---Laden with fruit and always green" -- and we find the Tree of Life, we come Home to the Child of Christmas who can and will bring Peace to our Hearts. Hallelujah.

The Truth does not have to make sense to the reasoning, linear mind, and it usually doesn't. But the Heart can Hear Its Song, the Heart can hear Its Glory right here in the world. Christmas is about that Christ Light, the Child, The Holy Eternal Apple Tree.

The simple words "The Allness of God" and "God is Love" ---those words make perfect sense to the little child who has no problem with believing. She loves fairytales and lore, magic and mystery and wonder. How grateful I am that she is still here with me just as she was then, now recognized for the one True Light she is.

Its fascinating, telescopes can now see billions of years into the past. How can that be? How Infinite is Infinite? The past is here and now and never goes anywhere. What was is forever, what is will always be. Everything is Here in the Absolute Nowness of this Ineffable God Being All. No one dies, nothing is lost. Our loved ones are still here, somehow, some way, I know this. Trust.

The child's fairytales are Truth in disguise. The Tangible world is Truth disguised as things. It tells us everything we need to know, if we are looking for It. God is here speaking to us through all things, in all ways. It's All God. And however He tells His story is up to Him.

We can call this Living One by a zillion names and try to explain Its Isness from a Trillion points of view, but no matter, it Really is All God. All.

Christmas understood symbolically tells us of the Child within us. The Perfect Child is the Messiah within us, the part of us that is holding God's hand, the little girl and little boy who does remember and romps and skips across God's Meadows and gentle fields of Love. We find our Self again, the self of us who understands things from this Wide Open Infinite All Inclusive, Unbridled View.

Christmas is the celebration of that Eternal Child in our Heart-- Christmas is the time to remember that the Holy Child is our Savior and that Child is born to us, with us here within our own Heart.

Well, perhaps too many words here, but this is my Merry Christmas message--I will trust it is alright---and I won't delete it.

Glad Tidings of Comfort and Joy-- Merry Wonders and Joy to all,

Sandy

 

Return To Essay List